Lent: Sex and Sexuality

I have been following a page via Facebook for a while called “Kissing Fish”, which I’ve mentioned before in this blog. It’s a “Progressive” christian page, which I’m not going to address again in this article as I’ve devoted time to it previously. If you want to know my opin ions on the subject look at my posts from earlier this year.

One of the things I find on this page mentioned a lot is sex and sexuality. The majority of the posts and articles seem recently to be focussed on acceptance of “alternative” sexuality, the “LGBT” issues.

I have opinions about sex and sexuality, as any person does. It is something intensely private and was designed by God as a way to bring a deep closeness and unity between a husband and wife. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall become united and cleave to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” Genesis 2:24 (Amplified)

Now the more I read and re-read this passage, the more it strikes me that this is a description of conception. The purpose of marriage in God’s plan is for the unity of a man and a woman to result in a literal unity – a baby. One flesh made from two.

Now I acknowledge procreation isn’t the only reason God made Marriage. Marriage itself is a metaphor of His relationship with us, and allows a language to develop of the roles of a husband and wife within the structure. Equally important, but quite different. My wife and I are very much equal, but we are completely different. She is a medical doctor, a driven “A-type” person whose Myers-Briggs scoring showed her to be an ITFJ. I am a “B-type”, ENFP – almost a perfect opposite. In fact, when our results were mapped on a graph they formed a near perfect mirror which when placed together formed a rectangle. My weaknesses are supported by her strengths and vice versa.

Being polar opposites has it’s drawbacks, but it also means we see a massive picture over our lives. Her detail-oriented nature allows her to help me move towards the vision we share for the big picture I see when we look together at our relationship and future.

But I digress a little. Only a little though.

Sex is a part of marriage. It brings intimacy and more to the union, and is designed for pleasure – in the context of the marriage bed.

I find the concept of sexuality and sexual immorality one which is troubling. So many teachers today seem to disregard Paul’s writing in 1 Corinthians 6 about sexual sin as being worse than other sins. The words used are “catamites and sodomites” [6:9] (depending on the translation) to refer to homosexual acts, joining with prostitutes to refer to heterosexual acts. The instruction is clear – “Shun immorality and all sexual looseness [flee from impurity in thought, word, or deed]. Any other sin which a man commits is one outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is the temple (the very sanctuary) of the Holy Spirit Who lives within you, Whom you have received [as a Gift] from God? You are not your own, You were bought with a price [purchased with a <sup class="footnote" value="[b]”>preciousness and paid for, made His own]. So then, honor God and bring glory to Him in your body.” 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 (Amplified)

Note Paul’s reasoning – sexual sin is a sin against our own body. All other sins are external, but sex not so. There is a difference. We all have this internal self-destructive behaviour.

A few years ago a young lady I was friends with had a pregnancy scare. She and her boyfriend (du jour) had slept together and then split up, and now she was – she thought – expecting his child. “David, it was an accident. The sex – it just happened” she told me when I asked her about sleeping with the boy.

She actually couldn’t grasp the concept (and later when we spoke to the boy neither could he) that they made a decision. They chose to have sex. I’ve never been sitting watching a movie with my wife and suddenly found us to be having sex without making a decision to do so.

In that respect, sex is like any other sin outside marriage – a choice to make. The result is different. It affects us on a deeper level.

My previous relationships before my marriage haunt my relationship with my wife. I never met a couple this wasn’t true for whether they were Christian or not. Comparisons, expectations and all manner of issues arist because of these acts. Stealing a watch can be overcome more easily. Either it can be paid for or returned. But losing a piece of yourself in sexual immorality is irreversible. It’s why God prompted Paul to say to flee from it.

In a secular society same-gender couples are going to happen, but let’s not kid ourselves that God accepts them.

Now I’m not saying the people are evil. The individuals are loved and cared for by God like all of us are. Sinful nature, inherited through the bloodline of Adam, means we all carry sin in us. Some more prone to some types than others. It says all sexual immorality is equal in God’s sight. Homo or hetero, God sees immorality.

But let’s give up the crusade to try to force everyone to believe sexual sin is irrelevant when the scripture – Old and New Testament – makes it clear it isn’t.

Let’s get back to the centre. Jesus Loves us and calls us to be like Him.

Love.

Accept.

Forgive.

Encourage others and ourselves to move away from sinful behaviour. Quit trying to embrace it.

God won’t. We mustn’t.

Live pure – not just sexually, but particularly sexually.

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